athelstanent: Anthropamorphic boar with big cigar (Default)
[personal profile] athelstanent
Well my illness is over and the snot control medicine is doing its job. Yeah!

The odd that I'm trying to figure out why something I did years ago would suddenly overwhelm me with feelings of guilt. It can be every thing from true open mouth, insert foot moments, to being late to an appointment, or personal goal that I did not meet. Should I feel bad for talking back to my Aunt 15 years ago? About accidentally taping over a movie from my uncle from 13 years ago? How about saying something wrong to friends in college 7 years ago? I could go on and on about stupid things that I've done, that I've regretted, that I've worked on never doing again, that I've apologized for... when can I let go and not feel bad for those things? How can expect to grow when these things will come out of nowhere and seizures my mind for a moment as guilt washes over.

Date: 2004-01-26 10:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] strider-orion.livejournal.com
I know how you feel. I get those guilt twinges all the time. Espcially about stuff I did when I was young. I mean, stuff that dates back to middleschool! Mostly about me being mean and rotten to my brother and sister. I wish there was a way to make those things stop myself. If you find a cure, please tell me!

Date: 2004-01-28 05:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] athelstan.livejournal.com
Meep! I thought I responded to this!

I'll let you know as soon as I do come up with a solution. I think these are the sorts fo things that only come up when I'm feeling down. It's the things that can lead to a downward spiral. Luckly I've figured out is when I'm starting down the spiral and I can do things to help me get out. See my next LJ post (that will hopfuly not freak out like this one did and be posted at the same time as an old posting) for what I did this time. The only reason I can see my downward spiral is because I've been through so many of them I've just learned.

Date: 2004-01-30 02:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] clauditorium.livejournal.com
I had a flashback today to something really stupid I said and I cringed. It's natural. All it means is that you learned from it, and it reminds you that you have a conscience.
These things will pop back up once in a while. Not much you can do about it, so simply let them pop up and fade back out.

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